So the other night while at a nice intimate concert in a coffee shop I was reminded of my unconscious habit of having what has wonderfully be referred to as “resting bitch face”.

I was tapping my feet to the beat and oft-times my hands as well. I was swaying with the music and having a great time. But at some point I realized that my face did not exude the same happiness my body was. I was focused on the musicians on stage and therefore my brow was furrowed, my lips pursed and I was almost not even blinking. It was a very weird realization but I knew that my face was relaxed.

So I started to force my lips to go lax and give a soft smile, to broaden my eyes so that the smile reached their depths. It was a dark venue where I’m ninety-nine percent certain that even the couple sitting across from me couldn’t see my face and yet I found myself repeatedly forcing myself out of resting bitch face. At one point I realized I was paying more attention to how my face looked than the music.

The moment I returned to enjoying myself and listening to the music my face went right back to its comfortable focused look. The same look I have on my face at this point in time. Lips pursed, eyes almost blank. I’m focused, I’m concentrating. My happiness is not pouring from my eyes but that doesn’t mean that I’m not happy.

So I ask – for my sake and the sake of my fellow resting bitch facers – when you see someone that’s concentrating, or focused, or just plain resting and their face looks grumpy, bitchy or any other similar emotion remember – that may not be what they’re feeling so don’t judge. And goodness, even if it IS the way they’re feeling, don’t judge.